My word is my bond. Superstar Me

hiatus

hʌɪˈeɪtəs/

noun

1. a pause or break in continuity in a sequence or activity.

Have I been on a hiatus? Yes and no. 

There has been a definite break in continuity of the blog, but everything else has moved forward at the speed of light. 

I promised you something the last time I posted and I've made good on that promise. Life never let me lose sight of it. 

Superstar Me: Adanna and the Dog Star.

Sample Page from the book

Available on Amazon

Click the link below to watch the EXCITING book trailer and get your copy now!!

www.starinspiredbooks.com

This book has evolved so much from its beginning concept, through illustrations, illustrators, and elements; but what never changed was the purpose for writing it, which is to be a part of the availability of diverse books that empower and inspire children universally, but especially for children of the African diaspora.

Sneak Peak

I've been missing for quite a while, but I've been working on something wonderful for you guys!

I promise!

Here's a sneak peak!

Seize the Day!

#HappyThursday

Just call it pizza Part 2! - Black bean goodness

Hey!

Excited to bring you another new healthy recipe I found for the kids.

Its easy...Its delicious and full of goodness.


Mom Tips: 
There's no meat or dairy. You can feel free to add your choice or cheese or cheese alternative if you wish.

If making some for the whole family, add the jalapeno on top of the pizza rather than in the black bean dip. 

Ingredients

4 corn tortillas, or whole-wheat tortillas (6-inches in diameter) I used Ezekiel Sprouted wraps
1/2 cup Black Bean Dip, recipe follows
1 large tomato, seeded and diced
1 cup shredded green cabbage
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro leaves
Directions
Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

Place the tortillas onto a baking sheet and spread 2 tablespoons of black bean dip on top of each tortilla. Top with tomato and cabbage and bake for 10 minutes. Remove the pizzas from the oven and sprinkle some cilantro on each one. Allow to cool slightly before cutting into wedges.

Black Bean Dip:
2 teaspoons olive oil
1/2 medium onion, diced
1 clove garlic, minced
1 tablespoon minced jalapeno pepper
1 (15-ounce) can black beans, drained and rinsed
2 tablespoons lime juice
1/4 teaspoon ground cumin
2 tablespoons coarsely chopped fresh cilantro leaves
1 tablespoon water
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
Heat the oil in a skillet over a medium heat. Add onions and saute until they soften, about 2 minutes. Stir in the garlic and jalapeno and cook for 1 minute more.

Put the beans into a food processor. (I used a blender and a spoon and it was fine.)  Add the onion mixture and the rest of the ingredients and puree until smooth.

Yield: 1 cup

Recipe courtesy of the Food Network

Let's just call it "pizza" - Helping mom's serve healthy alternatives. pt.1

I dedicate this post to all the mom's that are seeking healthy alternatives for their picky kids, especially toddlers and those that have allergies and eczema.

I used to think that a tummy full with some veggies on the side was a good thing. We have to make sure our kids are fed right? Eat all their dinner right?
But having a toddler who refuses fruits and veggies even though I do, got me thinking. PLUS..I now know that the truth is...a tummy full is not a tummy full anymore.
GMO's, PROCESSED JUNK....INGREDIENTS WE CANT SPELL!!....  Time to take back our lives...


Introducing a healthy 0 meat, 0 "cheese", 0 "milk", chock full of veggies, filled with proteins and vitamins dish, that I like to call "Let's just call it pizza"

(In adult language, its a frittata with zucchini, mushrooms and tomatoes. Please don't tell your kids its loaded with veggies until after they're done. :-))

Ingredients/Shopping List:

(Semi-domestic mommy tip: You can copy and paste this right into your smart phone notepad or into an email and then open at the grocery store.)

1 1/2 cups of roughly chopped Ripe tomatoes.
( Fresh is great, but canned organic roasted or whole is a good choice too)
1 cup sliced baby bella or white Mushrooms
Egg Replacer or 2 eggs and 4 eggwhites ( depending on your kids dietary needs or allergies
1/2 large Zucchini thinly sliced
1/2 cup of red onions finely chopped
2 cloves of garlic minced/crushed
1-2 TBSP  olive oil ( preferably extra virgin)
1/2 tsp sea salt
1/2 - 1 cup of shredded vegan mozzarella
Black pepper to taste
1 tbsp chopped oregano

(***Note: You can either use four eggs and 1/2 cup almond milk or simply follow the above. )

Preheat oven to 350 degrees

Prepare veggies:

Chop tomatoes or open canned tomatoes and place in a dish
Slice zucchini and then half them into semi circles.
Slice mushrooms
Finely dice red onion

If using almond milk Measure your Almond milk and then mix with the 4 whole eggs

Grate the vegan mozarella ( You can find this in your specialty aisles at the food store or at your local vegan or health store.)

If using eggs and whites or egg and egg white replacers. Separate your 2 whole eggs and 4 eggwhites, then whisk them til theyre nice and frothy.

Heat an oven safe frying pan over medium high heat. When ready, place the olive oil in to heat slightly ( remember that heating any oil to high temps makes it toxic!)
Reduce heat and then saute the mushrooms, garlic and onions. About 3-5 minutes. (Make sure they do not char or burn! :-)

Add sliced zucchinis on top to layer. Then add tomatoes. And a pinch of salt evenly over. ( Starting to feel like we're making pan top lasagna huh? lol)

Let those veggies cook about 3-5 more minutes

Pour your egg mixture over the vegetables. Then add another pinch of salt, ( optional) and black pepper to taste (optional). Let cook for two minutes on low.

Place in oven for 7-10 minutes only. Checking with a table knife to make sure its cooked through.

MAKE SURE YOU USE YOUR OVEN MITT OR TOWEL TO TAKE OUT OF THE OVEN!!! Or else! You've been warned.

Invert onto a large round dish, or slice pizza style right in the pan and serve!

Social Networks - The TRUTH OF WHO YOU ARE!

Y'all remember MySpace, Hi5, BlackPlanet ?......The era of the social network!




Everyday we turn on our laptops, or smart pads and connect to a source before we do anything else.

Usually that source is a social network.

We are seemingly addicted to plugging in to other's lives.

But what is it really all about?

The internet is a living, 'breathing' thing! A consciousness.

We decide what part of that consciousness we want to align ourselves to.

Look at your Facebook friends.  Look at their names..their aliases....their pictures....Read their posts. Are they largely ignorant, bitching, catty, sarcastic....or mostly political, revolutionary, philosophical? Know that you create your space in these social networks; It is an insight to the connections that you willfully make because of WHO YOU ARE.

Check out your twitter timeline. Is it mostly uplifting, full of movers and shakers, thinkers and consciousness,.....or riddled with mindless banter to fill up the spaces between your obligations?

The people we log in to watch, stalk or interact with...are an extension of our consciousness.

So when you log in again, or no doubt go back to the Facebook or twitter page that is already open on your browser, take a look at the opportunities you have opened your spirit to by who you've chosen...because of where you are in your life.

LIKE your existence enough to build it and not contaminate it!

Retweet a version of yourself that you are proud of!

I realized that social networks weren't always what I was made to believe they were, places to connect to OTHERS and meet people. They are ways to open your eyes to all the extensions of your self and your desires.

Peace

Get outta here!

"UGHHH!! Get outta here!"

You are a sniveling, complaining, judgmental  whiny, negative Nancy, bitter Shleprock, and we can't deal with your bad air anymore!!


At the beginning of each year, most people join exercise programs, start new diets and explore avenues of self-help. Its a time of restoration and a sense of new beginnings.

IF IT IS JANUARY ANYth AND YOU ARE DRAGGING YOUR BUTT AROUND, COMPLAINING, SAGGING YOUR JAWS DOWN, FROWNING AND B$&%ING TO ANYONE THAT WILL HEAR YOU, PUTTING ON FAKE SMILES AND JUDGING OTHERS, GOSSIPING  .....LISTEN....Nobody has time for that!!! Imagine what the rest of your year will look like honey?

The effort that it takes to stay optimistic and to commit to being in a peaceful and abundant state of mind is priceless. It takes discipline and determination and a certain Je ne sais quoi to keep your head above water. The last thing you need when you've decided to take that journey is a person in your circle or your personal space, spewing venom, subliminal resentment or spilling their self pity everywhere.

I'm not talking about people who have genuine problems that are difficult or have gone through trauma or hardship or emotional turmoil. We enjoy being there for our friends when life is hard on them.

 I'm talking about people who spend so much time judging others, putting on a show, or feeling like the world owes them a favor because of their own self-proclaimed fabulousness, that they don't realize they are toxic themselves...until nobody wants to bother with them much anymore. (And even then they think its everyone else. - No one is jealous of you, ....its you! Your attitude and your mindset suck!)

There is also much to be said for those that are not genuine. Just because you are pleasant, does not mean you are nice. The false exterior can be so transparent! Examine your thoughts, and the mind you are in when you speak to others or about their situations. If you are ugly on the inside, no amount of fake will prevent others from "feeling your vibes" ...people are more intuitive than you think.



Girl...you are grown.....get your self together!

Get REAL !!!

In quantum physics, theory states that "An object does not exist independently of its observer!"...which means things don't exist until we pay attention to, or look at it, or perceive it. I don't know about y'all but THAT'S HUGE!!!!!!!!!!! #EPIPHANY

I've always been of the conviction that when we have a problem we should look at it from every angle. Study it, figure it out, worry and lose sleep over the pros and cons of it and then formulate a plan.

But if we were to take the approach that Quantum Physics suggests in theory, to our thoughts , that "An object does not exist independently of its observer!"..... THEN IT MEANS THAT OUR THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS HAVE NO LIFE UNTIL WE DECIDE TO LOOK AT THEM, STUDY THEM AND BREATHE MEANING INTO THEM.

Even if the theoretical magic of quantum physics does not lend itself to our cerebral outpourings, can it be applied with the same effect?

I put it to the test myself. Having been confronted with strong emotion, rejection or resentment, I chose to BREATHE through the emotion, letting it pass over me, rather than become a part of me. I allowed myself to feel it, without actually focusing on it. I focused on my breathing..the energy emanating from my hands..feet.....body...and focused on the present moment..until all I felt was peace.

Talk about a "Peace that surpasses all understanding!" 

Ever had a WOW moment? Well I love Oprah, but pardon me for one second because "aha!" will not do justice to the realization in that moment.

It gave a whole new meaning to the term "Get real!"

At that point I was in control. My thoughts were bought to subjection. And I was not a slave to the person or thing that was the catalyst for setting off those thoughts and resultant emotions in me.

It was the beginning of an unlearning...the  burning of a miseducation.....creating my own REAL!

Do you dare to get REAL? 

The Ramen Noodle life transformation

It's January 7th.... 7 days into the new year, and some people are already about that Ramen noodle  life. How many ways can you fix 30 cent noodles until you realize that this is crazy?!

Christmas and the jollification of the holidays came and went and most of our dollars with it.
But besides the constant brainwashing of consumerism, what else is to blame?

How many of us are dining on the choicest canned meats and unnamed animal body parts in the struggle to make it to pay day?

Are you stretching that perm? Limiting those car runs? Sweating out your makeup because you wanna conserve ac? Drinking all the company coffee and tea in a fight til time to go home?

Santa is not pleased.

"You've been bad...."

 Are we bought up in a culture that promotes paying ourselves first, saving our money and planning for the things we desire, investing or spending responsibly?

And if we aren't, how can we change that for future generations?

1.) Do our kids have a piggy banks that we encourage them to fill before they invest their money into the latest trend or tempting sweets?

2.) Do we introduce the concept of "saving" and "bank" and "cost" and "expenses" and "wealth" early in life?

We've started the concept of saving early....

3.) Do we make the topic of consumerism a table topic? Do we teach our kids to be informed consumers and to research their investments or do we let them fall prey to marketing and peer pressure by showing them that we're willing to survive on suspect proteins and starches just to keep up with the Joneses?


Start today. Our future begins with the making right of our wrong doings by teaching and doing a new thing. Tuna salad and rice anyone?

One man's trash...

Recently I've had the good fortune of HAVING to clear out the trunk of my car....

Fun right?  ( Insert dancing emoticon.animation here)

So I decided to tackle the old slouch bags in my closet too. You know the ones that we always throw "meaningful" things into and forget them once the day is done. Only to have em catch dust in the corner of our closets.

Old pictures, magazines, love letters, unfinished projects...... So many new opportunities to re-energize, remember, restart, and reminisce. Who knew how cathartic throwing out old crap really is?

It wasn't only a lesson in how to hoard less when you have to, it was an epiphany.

Energy cannot be destroyed! Ok..so I didn't discover that principle/theory. But as I rumbled through, sorting, throwing out and gathering together, I realized that :

1.) Throwing out things we no longer use doesn't destroy their memory or the chance of them being needed later on. It helps us to learn the lesson of letting go of what no longer serves us without forgetting it. We can throw it away and regain the energy that holding on to things that no longer serve us, is draining.

2.) Holding on to things that we know will help us can force us to action to rekindle what we have lost sight of.

A picture of our former healthy bodies, or a smile that we no longer know...a project to-do list unanswered...a book unread....

What unfinished business do you have lurking in your closets. trunks, drawers...

What energy do you need to reclaim or transform? 

The other Great Equalizer

It has been said that education is the great equalizer of peoples, but verily I say unto you....

The great equalizer of women is not education...,it is "the other woman"

A man will SHAME you with the "other woman".

 After you have toiled and tired at making yourself 'elite' enough AND "Refined" enough, and after you've touted all your natural beauty and elegant regalia and flaunted your educated opinion, and are worthy to be called "wife material" or "professional", it is then that he will HUMBLE you with the most ratchet of selections. 

Sadly the first to read this blog and say "not me".  He may just be working to make you apart of the club.

Am I a woman scorned? Hardly. Just a woman who has taken off the rose colored glasses and embraced that the previous ideals were apart of my Miseducation.

Am I saying that all men are inevitably unfaithful? Trick Question. Well,  No. .....But in the event that he is....Don't ever compare yourself to the other woman or "measure up" and feel bad about yourself, because it hardly ever has anything to do with you.

You could be a beaut!, brilliant! Charismatic! It DOES NOT matter.

Whether or not we leave a man behind after infidelity, be sure that you bear in mind this:

The motive for cheating doesn't require smarts or beauty or an ideal package to be fulfilled!

Just a paper bag..and an alibi!,,,and THAT levels the playing field!

Be good luvs!

ENOUGH??

8 hours..a sore throat..a headache. tense shoulders..school pickup..a lively toddler.....a sink of  dishes and a faceless skinned chicken breast later..I asked myself. Is this everything?!

Is this all?!

Do you have energy to pursue your passions when your obligations pull you in every direction but the pillow?

The Ambitious woman choosing a life of motherhood and a profession that is not the be all and end all of her personal goals soon realizes that 24 hours is not enough. Unless you have support. But some things can be neglected in the thirst for "More" from life; Namely yourself!

One day it hit me. What else do I want? And WHY?

Is M-O-M not enough? Is ME not enough?

When I leave this earth where does my legacy lie? In the projects I've done? In the professional seat I've warmed day to day decorated by critique and protocol? In the letters behind my name?

What will really count when my daughter has to go out into the world as an independent person? Will it be how many people that believe that Im worthy? Or how many things that validate my worth?


What is ENOUGH for you?

What part of you is enough?....... What part of you will you leave behind?

I'm not a blogger, I just think alot...

  Kudos to all the persons out there that are actively involved in blogging and maintaining their blog.

The cool backgrounds and layouts and giveaways and allll that jazz are so delicious!!!!

Somehow though, a 9-5, a family, hobbies, and obligations sometimes make it hard for blogging mom's to stay on top of things. You've gotta manage your time like to the letter!

Many people ask me..where do you find the time! And I dont even have a fancy blog. lol

  Blog topics can swirl around in our heads all day and by the time we are able to sit still and actually relax...who wants to do something other than a mindless activity!? (Just me? O.K)

 So to all the fabulous mom bloggers out there, I tip my cheese doodle-late -night-snack to you and all your free time having selves!!!


  With that said....I just want to conclude with this..>>>.Great posts to come!!...I'm working on a whole BUNCH of new things.Im so EXCITED! Definitely adventuring! I cant wait to share with you!!!!!! As soon as my baby girl decides to stop mixing water on the living room floor, trying on my highest heels, plastering her body with her skin cream and drinking the bubble solution instead of blowing it, I'll be right on it.

But for now..my blogging hiatus is explained as such....Im not a blogger, I just think alot.

Cheers!

Monst..I mean Mother-In-Law anyone?

Every woman that has had a serious relationship before has met her partner's ( DUN-DUN-DUN- Scary movie music) Mother.

For most women it's a somewhat intimidating experience, for the most obvious reason of course; and that is..Even if you are dating the toothless, balding spawn of Satan, his mother will scrutinize you to make sure that you are a worthy sacrifice for her "good child"

In Bahamian cultures, you have to worry about being pretty enough, not too "black", questioned about who your "people" are, what you do for a living, and made to prove yourself as a "good Christian girl " before you can earn the blessings of mother dearest.

Once the "blessing" is received by Pope John Mother however, the game has just begun.
Through observation, ( my perpetual disclaimer - because I have not experienced any of this first hand, ehem) There are 3 main types of mothers that we encounter.

1.) Queen of Spades-

 This mom calls a spade a spade. She does not cloak her son's behavior, will not cover for him when side chicks call the house or "drop by"; will listen objectively to a situation that you two are having and be fair in her advice or counsel. She may or may not genuinely love and accept you as her daughter in law, but as a person, she is beautiful to a point of being fair and unbiased. 

Should you date a man with this type of mother, not only are you blessed to be safe to start a "friendship" - calling to say hello and how are you., gift giving, lunch, etc...But you should have a pretty solid, understanding guy that will be willing to not only admit his wrongs, but make them right. And whats better, you love mom so much that you and possibly your children in the future have a better relationship with your husbands family because if the bonds that you both create.

2.) The Joker -

 This mother will be cordial. She will pretend to be evolved enough to accept you for the wonderful, intelligent, kind and/or successful woman that you are, or even just because you love her son. However, beware!!!!!!!!!!!!! This mother is the queen of disguise. Even if she knows her son is slicker than grease, lies more than a dead fish in a fishbowl, or is as romantic as mud , she will always. always, always make her arms and ears a shelter and will give him the reassurance that you are a/the problem.
If you have been "blessed" to have such a mother-in-law or your significant other's mom. Your best survival tip is to just know that he will run to her, and just know that she will keep you the villain at all costs, and be ok with that.  Because she will be all fake smiles when you come around.


Case in point - A friend of mine's husband told his mother that his wife didn't want him to go anywhere  and made noise about him doing anything he enjoyed. The mother's advice - Don't let "her" stress you. Remember you are the head of the house. You're a MAN , you're supposed to go out.'

What that mother did not know was that he was working  from morning til night fall, and on off days and weekends going out to have recreation for at least 5 hours at a time, so that his wife, a working woman, had to play single mother to their son, clean the house, cook the food and rot. (even on her off days, and he refused to help pay for a sitter or housekeeper.) Her free time and recreation as a working individual and woman? Nil. And that wasn't up for discussion.

The mother never suggested taking his wife on a date once every two weeks. She never asked do you spend any time with your family and do something special to balance your much needed time to yourself. She never asked what he was doing or did to ensure that his wife also was entitled to her downtime. She just made the woman a villain straight away, and further made their marriage difficult.

And whenever the wife was around, mommy dearest was all smiles and niceness.

3.) Queen of Hearts -
Without too much details - Just know that she is the Queen of his heart.

Case in Point - As a guy proudly told me that his mother always reminds him  - "I am your Earthly GOD" she says. Wow.......

So you dear girlfriend/wife/fiance- -. Thou shalt not smell thyself and think that you, your ideas, or your needs will EVER come before her and her desires and plans. And further more, You'll never be good enough.

That's it.

The suggestion for you?  -RUN!!!!! I'll wait.


Can I get a witness?

Wendy's Philosophy. Conference with Madison, Freud, Dave and Me,

At about 18 months when my daughters vocabulary began to expand enormously, I noticed that she would call every man "Daddy"

On the line in Wendy's, I noticed that she was looking at another man with glasses, and saying : "Daddy"


Aside from being embarrassed that he might think I'm a baby mama who's child didn't know their daddy; I was concerned because I needed to know why my baby girl was confused about identifying her father all of a sudden.

She kept doing this, and I kept getting my share of the Maury Povich glare from strangers.

As weeks went by, we found ourselves back in Wendy's, and suddenly it hit me. When she called another man on the line "Daddy" I said to her. "No baby...say Man. That's not Daddy. That's a man"

As we sat down at a table in the restaurant to have our usual lunch date, a picture of "DAVE" the Wendy's founder guy, was on the wall. Madison pointed to it and said "See Man."

I was so excited! "Yes baby.. that's a man."

Then she pointed at an elderly gentleman in the restaurant and said "See Man..fries..."

"Yes baby...the man is eating his fries." She smiled! I smiled! We had a breakthrough. She now understood that we don't call all males 'daddy'. These species were called men, and only one out of millions in the world, is your father.

I took out my wallet and showed her a picture of her dad. "Who is this baby?" I asked.

"Da-dee" she said!

She's never had a problem confusing them again.


What it told me was that Freud was on to something. ( DUH.....LOL) And it made me question exactly how deep the whole psychology of Daddy being the model of man for a woman, is.

Do we as women and adolescent girls see our Daddy as THE model for man?


And if so how much do our fathers, their presence or absence distort or create our entire experience of men and relationships with men?

Implications.....I'll allow you to form your own based on your experience with or without your father.

Just something to think about.

Empowering victims? How NOT to teach your child to tie their shoelaces

• 
  

Once upon a time..minding my own business....

I overheard a father say to his young toddler son in a waiting area : "Boy,  you need to learn to tie your own laces. You have to know how to do things for yourself." 
"If you don't know how to do things for yourself, a woman is gonna have to do it for you and then she's gonna treat you bad!"

At the time I didn't think about it too deeply. I figured he was just making a joke for the female adults around him to hear, because surely his toddler had no clue what he was implying. So I smirked, not amused, and went about reading my magazine.

But there came a Sunday, when I was feeling liberated and decided not to cook an early meal, but to go and get my hair washed and blown out instead and enjoy some me time instead.

I thought to myself. Is this what that man meant? Am I starving my husband and "doing him bad" as the man suggested, by not cooking an afternoon Sunday meal as I usually did? Although he can handle himself in the kitchen...what about men who cannot?

Then it hit me. This is exactly what we do to subconsciously put our children in the victim's chair mentally and emotionally.

By saying he was to learn to be efficient and do things for himself, it was toward the goal of avoiding being "treated badly" by a woman. A woman who didn't choose to do his bidding, lets say if he was in the proverbial doghouse. What that statement said was :

a.) You must protect yourself against the evil woman son
b.) A woman will use any moment available to have an upper arm on you, so you must arm yourself

So not only is he teaching him that the woman is the enemy, but that she is inherently manipulative and that he should be wary of her and defensive against her. That he would acquire skills just so that he wouldn't fall victim to manipulation!
 The child hardly knows the difference between girls and boys yet  and is being indoctrinated!

Many mothers and fathers are guilty of this.

A more empowering statement would have been.


Come on. Let's tie your laces. You must practice so that you can become very good at it. Then every will see how smart and capable you are!!

And if he wanted to use a woman in his parable, he could have stated further: When you grow up a woman is going to admire you because you are so smart and you can get things done so well!"

Look at how that changes the whole mindset.

The woman is now someone who will admire him because he is capable. She is a person that respects a strong capable mate. And, it would also help him to understand that he would be in the position to do things for his mate as well because he has value and efficiency.

And should he ever be in the proverbial doghouse, Hopefully he would see it as an opportunity to write a laundry list of how much he appreciates the things his mate does on a daily basis, when she decides not to do them.

Ok...so I'm reachcing there ..just a tad.

But, seriously, we all know growing up we were told to be smart or tidy or careful, not because of how it would build our character and integrity, but because of how it would stop some evil from befalling us.


Let's be mindful of how we scold and praise our children, so that we don't sit them in the victim's chair and load them with bitter doctrines before they've had a chance to truly live their own lives.

Prince Harry the Great!

Brethren can we candidly speak?

I dont mean to get all "righteous fist" movement on you guys, but there is DEFINITELY something bothering me this week.

So, all the headlines were screaming of PRINCE HARRY'S VISIT to the Caribbean,  like Jamaica, Belize and of course here in the Bahamas.

 Well! I must tell you it was quite the uproar here. Grown women and little girls alike having both fleeting and arduous fantasies of capturing the Prince's heart as he came to visit our city. Well we wouldn't have had all those years of Cinderella fantasy brain washing go to waste now would we?

If my daughter's school were taking a troop to see the Prince, I assure you that I would first ask her, how she felt the King should be preparing to meet Princess Madison instead.

Why all of this focus on exalting the "royalty" of a stranger when our children and Princes and Princesses in their own right, and right here on our own soil everyday?!

  Now I don't mean to be so bold and by no means am I being disrespectful, but WHY ARE WE SO OTHERWISE HYPED ABOUT THE PRINCE VISITING?


How did all the pomp and pageantry negate that we are no longer of the "British colonial" all hail the king/prince/Queen mindset" ? Having our students get together like good little colonized boys and girls to do songs and dances to welcome British Royalty to our Island and roll out the red carpet for him? Hospitality??  o.k. I can accept that.


And, Yes I get it, he was showing that he was down to Earth by grooving with natives and dancing and merry making, and this was both delightful and refreshing. I am sure the Prince is a wonderful man.

  But to celebrate him coming to tell us..( and I paraphrase) .'.youre good lads and lasses, the Queen says you're great.  'What kind of 14th century madness is this?!



Oh and lets not forget the catapult in fame for our current Miss Bahamas as she got a chance to speak with him and wisely tangle her name with his in the headlines surrounding his visit. ( Disney music for when Harry met Anastagia plays in the background.)

But what REALLY grinds my gears is an article that I read, about an extraordinary girl named Anna, from the Island of Abaco, who is blind, and yet rose to the title of Student of the Year among Primary Schools in the Bahamas, who says: "Although I am blind, I do not accept this as a disadvantage," 

Here is an excerpt from a story I read on http://www.looktothestars.org/news/7987-prince-harry-attends-youth-rally-in-bahamas.

After His Royal Highness left she said: "Oh my gosh, it was amazing to meet Prince Harry. I was so excited and I just loved it and can’t wait to tell my family about it. He was very friendly and he was asking me about my speech, how old I was and where I was from. He asked me if I had been blind since birth.

“After my speech he congratulated me and said: Well done. All of the children I sit with at school were like: Oh my gosh, if it was us. They were so excited I was meeting him.”

In his short speech, Prince Harry told the youngsters: “I know Her Majesty would wish me to extend her personal encouragement to you all in your endeavours, whether they be in education, civic and community activities or in the sporting arena. In being here, taking part in the national youth rally, each and every one of you is promoting admirable morale, social and patriotic values.”

Prince Harry was clearly impressed with what he saw, telling them: “Basically you’re doing your country proud, and don’t you look smart. The Queen would be delighted by this and, on her behalf, I congratulate you all.”

Read more: http://www.looktothestars.org/news/7987-prince-harry-attends-youth-rally-in-bahamas#ixzz1oXxOAoVA

 I LOVE THE FACT that Prince Harry took the time out to sit with Anna, and he must have absolutely made her day! She now felt like all of her hard work and determination was being recognized worldwide.
However, I am saddened by the fact that a simple Well Done, and a few mundane questions, and a pat on the back to this extraordinary, focused,, and talented young girl was enough, just because he was a "Prince."
I am sure that her own teachers and parents have said and done more to empower her over the years. But for some reason this Amazing child, was made to feel validated by the visit and "well done" of a prince who knew nothing of her struggle but a cover note.
 As if she was being put on a platter to say, here Prince, here is a worthy lamb for you to carry news of to the Queen.. When in essence, HE was in the presence of Greatness!!!!

And so it is with the whole Prince comes to town fiasco. "The prince runs with Usain Bolt", "The Prince dances the jig with residents", ..but How is the king changing the face of these places that he has visited besides proclaiming their shores touched by a demi god?

Our children do not need to be taught that greatness lies outside of them to those privileged by birthright, but that greatness is born of nobility, dreams, focus, recovering from failure, enterprise, endurance, smart work, networking, wisdom and love. 

I want to roll out a red carpet and have some Demi-god status for the people that are actually making a difference in our lives and in our children's lives.

Yes to some degree we all should have a posture of respect for person who have risen to levels of authority and hierarchy in their respective homes, and hospitality is definitely a must. But for us to pretend that a mystical, magical air of fortune has befallen us because the Prince has come is nonsense. Especially when we are looking our own Princes and Princesses in the face everyday.


*whispers - (FOLLOW ..I know you all love reading, appreciate your comments.....GO AND FOLLOW!)

Peace and Love!

Listen you Transformers!!!.....

iTunes on Shuffle...... #np Pass me over. Anthony Hamilton......

And its NAP TIME..The best time of day ( Martini glass *cheers* to all my mommy's out there!)


Hey guys...I've been Burdened by some B words lately.


Some B words that have become too commonplace as adjectives, synonyms and definitions of women. Let's call them TRANSFORMERS.

BITTER.........BITCH.........BAGGAGE

           BAGGAGE              BITTER                BITCH


How do you like them bad boys?


Its not strange for us to hear ourselves and women that we know equated with these heavy 10 pound words. Sometimes they use 'em all in one sentence about 1 solitary woman. 


They tell a story though. 
A story of a woman that is no longer her ORIGINAL, SINGULAR SELF.

It tells a story of a woman that has been, TRANSFORMED...if you will....into something lesser, heavier and darker, because of her building walls and adorning her self with jaded attitudes due to negative experiences, emotions and encounters.

In my Miseducation, I can recall how I figured: 

Being a "grown up" would somehow work it all out. I would finally get a chance to be ME. And do MY things. And go where I want. And be who I am.

But how quickly life showed me that BEING A GROWN UP IS THE ONE THING THAT WILL TEST WHO YOU REALLY ARE. And it's then up to you to show the world that what you're made of is greater than the lessons; greater than the painful realizations; greater than the people that manifest truths and evils in our lives.

When we carry people from one lesson to another - Baggage.

When we carry disappointment from one lesson to another and guard our hearts with swords and anger- Bitch

When we carry poison from our painful experiences into new encounters and mingle them together - Bitterness

Then we become defined and derailed by the things that are suppose to help us define ourselves.

We all have these low points that make or break us. Can I get an Amen? 


For me, This is When I asked God to allow me to be open to the truth of the Universe and not my emotions. And do you know that in this 2012, iPhone era, of this attend-church-only-once-in-a-while-woman's life God answered me!?! 


God allowed the universe to speak to this emotional Cancer, fairy-taled, miseducated female clearly....


Here is the truth that he shared with me, that I now share with you and welcome you to post on your mirrors, on your hearts in your wallets, on your doors, and in your little girls ears.....

THE TRUTH: 

You do not have to hate a thing in order to release it. When you hate and despise, you change yourself, you kill your own spirit. When you exact revenge, the thing you despise is controlling YOU, and YOUR emotions...and YOUR thoughts and ordering YOUR steps. BE STILL. Meaning...still love, still remain calm, still show kindness...and simply remove yourself from the source of your discontent...reevaluate, learn the lesson, and emerge stronger, and still YOU. MY GOD! What a revelation! What is controlling you?

Love you all! 


Dont forget to leave me notes and comments so we can share! 

*whispers* - follow!!!!!  

TELL THEM.

Walking out of one appointment and heading to another yesterday morning, feeling a little blue, I saw a little girl, about 6 years old, walking with what may have been her grandmother. She had her hair plait in tiny cornrows, and a light green gingham print summer dress, and sandals. Dark Chocolate skin and slender little legs. None of which caught my eyes as much as the realization of what she was...a bud. A diamond in the rough. Innocent. A promise..A legacy in the making......BEAUTY! To me she was the epitome of pretty! Without even remembering how she looks....that wasnt what I saw....

 As I approached my car, I stopped and wiggled my fingers at her and smiled. She wiggled hers back with a small questioning smile ( like who is this lady? I don't think I know her)

 When she was within air shot I said: 'Good Morning Pretty Girl!' That Happy-to-see-you  tone evident in my speech.
She replied Good Morning and kept walking with her guardian.
I opened my car door  and put my purse on the seat as I always do before I get in.
But she slowly turned around and looked thoughtfully a me with her hands in her 'kimber.' ( akimbo)

"WHY YOU CALL ME PRETTY?!? "  She demanded.

and with a bittersweet knowing-ness,I said: "BECAUSE YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!"

Her grandmother chuckled proudly and I waved them goodbye ( late for my workshop already)

As I plugged my iPod into the audio jack...and hit shuffle... here came the song "Just the Way you Are". by Bruno Mars. TALK ABOUT THE UNIVERSE AND ITS DRAMATIC EFFECTS!!!!!

Here are the beginning  lyrics for those who dont know it.


Oh, her eyes, her eyes
Make the stars look like they're not shinin'
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying
She's so beautiful
And I tell her everyday (yeahh)

I know, I know
When I compliment her she won't believe me
And it's so, it's so
Sad to think that she don't see what I see
But every time she asks me "Do I look okay? "
I say

[Chorus:]
When I see your face (face face...)
There's not a thing that I would change
'Cause you're amazing (amazing)
Just the way you are (are)
And when you smile (smile)
The whole world stops and stares for a while
'Cause girl you're amazing (amazing)
Just the way you are (are)


I thought that was (SO AMAZING) No pun intended. That that song would play first on my shuffle.

I thought of how we all need to hear those words. I thought of what else she may have been called and believed already. I thought about how she didnt fit what t.v and music videos and boys we went to school with thought of as 'pretty".
 I thought of how adamant she was about knowing my "reason" for calling her pretty.

 I cried...tears of joy,...tears of sorrow.Knowing she was just one. But what about the others.
I cried because I had a feeling no one would tell her how much she was worth. I was afraid that life would tell her lies..like it had me. 

I cried because I knew that I now had a responsibilty to tell my daughter everyday. I knew I had a  responsibility to tell all that I could..those simple words that could change a life if told before its too late...before the wrong person realizes the power of those words and uses them to ill effect.....


I hope you hear me.....




TELL THEM.