Monday, February 6, 2012

The feminist movement - The "Man's" cruel, evil, genius plan

  I have come to realize that this feminist revolution is of the devil.

Should Oprah have had children and a "husband" would she still have been the powerhouse she is?

The role of wife and mother, and professional is exceptionally demanding. And it often makes me question if in fact we were built to do all of them simultaneously or if we are to choose a path and follow it with singleness of purpose.

  After a 8 or 9 hour day of "hustling" to build your legacy and wealth, how much do you really and truly have left mentally and emotionally to give to a toddler, or teenager?

After dealing with clients all day and often times employers or employees with varying personalities what tolerance do we have for a man coming home after facing the same?

Yet many women do this....and are exhausted as hell!!!

Did we burn our bras for this?

The conspiracy theorist in me says that feminism was a plot of a man to get women out into the world so that they would inevitably spend less money, work less hard, all while making us feel empowered.
And we shaved our armpits and put on those high heels, burned the bras and hopped into the high powered male arena making less and getting less respect, like good girls, and still have to come home and cook his animal carcasses and take care of the house and the kids alone because that's still " a woman's job".......Priceless!


Dare I say that the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world, but the world is asking for us to rock less and less and work more and more. Taking our Primary focus away from the home and our loved ones.

In my miseducation the aim was to "BE INDEPENDENT"  "BUY YOUR OWN" "HAVE A CAREER"and at the same time be a lady worthy of a man's affection and a keeper of his home.

But wait a minute....Are women not already making a man's life work and purpose a little easier by not only being a wife and mother,but by going out and working so he doesn't need a 2 - 3 job hustle or a conglomerate, to make life run smoothly in the household?  So why am I to be a lady and play down my success to feed a man's ego and then put on high heels and serve steak and a smile with MAC lipgloss and feathered hair? Am I not logically too damn tired after being a man and woman all in one day?



For this reason I now know that the new education for our daughters should be to:

1.) Know thyself.
2.) Follow your passion with wholeheartedness

and if love should "find you" along the way.....

3.) Make sure that mofo can afford you the luxury of hiring a housekeeper, because there is no reason you should not be able to have time to feed your passions because you were washing dishes or folding laundry.

The trickle down effect -

  • Men will be trained to "make themselves worthy of a wife and to take care of a family" and not vice versa. 
  • In the family partnership it is no surprise that the man wins big time...so who is the prize possession? And who should be worthy of that? And who should "study to show themselves approved"?  
  • My dream is to hear a young boy being fussed out that he should get it right if he ever wants to find a wife. 
But you don't hear me though.....



I am a traditional woman at heart. I love the "hustle" of creative ideas being bought to fruition and having projects seen to completion, networking and being successful, but when it becomes a shackle because you are doing it out of NEED to provide, and not because it needs you and begs you to manifest it, and you love every minute of it, then we have just kicked ourselves and our own daughters in the butt, forcing them into an "independent" lifestyle ill-prepared..When the love for family and taking care of home tires them and hustle comes to a grinding halt... hubby still has enough life on his status bar to stay on the grind. Fair?? NEGATIVE.

Want your daughters to be independent?  Teach them...

THAT: "should love scrape its knees on the floors of life chasing after you and you (our little girls) oblige it....do not be afraid to ask..'what are you bringing to the table?, because if you want pretty little dinners on yours when you get off, I'm gonna need you to afford me the time to follow my passions and still have the time to be happy doing that for you.

7 comments:

  1. I can relate to this post. After getting married, becoming a blended family, (instantly having 3 kids), working in a business with my husband and then coming home to deal with dinner, chores etc. I became VERY unhappy. I would not sit down until 9, while my husband came home and did what he wanted. I felt it was unfair and it took a toll on my well being as well as the marriage.
    So my husband and I sat down and talked about it. The decision was made that I focus on home and family and he "bring home the bacon". Not popular in this day and age, but it works for us and has been for more than 8 years.
    When the time comes that we change the situation we will, together.

    btw New follower!

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  2. Its such a relief to know that other moms relate! I commend you for being true to yourself and being a full time wife and mom. Highfives that your husband was understanding enough to realize it as well.
    You are a trendsetter in this "modern day" movement of women. I think you're a hero for all women, just because you listened to your body and your heart and now you can give more freely of both to your home and family :-)
    Thanks for following. Love your blog also!

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  3. I am forever speaking about this. We have created a society that demands everything of women and nothing of men. We have a society of single mothers with husbands because sometimes all he is there doing is taking up space and creating a heavier work load.

    I told my friend that if I have a daughter I am going to teach her to be an independent dummy! By this I mean I will teach her to make her way in life on her own merits. Know how to take care of herself, pay her own bills, change her own flat tire and bring home the bacon and then play dumb when she has a man.

    We have indeed kicked ourselves in the butt with this equality and women independence drizzle. Because in the end we are still not equal. We are carrying the mother load.

    We women need to step back and demand that our men live up to their responsibilities. Let them learn to appreciate us again.

    I am on a new journey myself. I have always been an extremely independent woman to my own detriment. This leads to being taken for granted even when not on purpose. My husband got so used to me not asking for help and doing for myself that he stopped asking/offering and left me to my own devices. And I learned that I never learned how to depend on him and lean on him and show him that when push came to shove he had my back. Now I am learning to trust in him for my well being and our kids well being.

    I am now a stay at home mom with goals on becoming a work from home mom. (Cant help it. Too used to having my own money lol)And my husband shows me nothing but support and the occasional boot in the behind of encouragement.

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  4. "I told my friend that if I have a daughter I am going to teach her to be an independent dummy! By this I mean I will teach her to make her way in life on her own merits. Know how to take care of herself, pay her own bills, change her own flat tire and bring home the bacon and then play dumb when she has a man. " < WISDOM!

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  5. Thank you for tweeting me this article. You write very entertainingly and make many good points all women can relate to. It seems like your idea of Feminism and my idea of Feminism are not the same, though. Feminism for me is that I get treated equally, like a person first, not like a woman. If you see having to work as independence and family relations/child bearing as a woman's real job/focus, you are applying a male label to the situation that is already unfair. By that I mean, it is not just the woman's place to make a family and "keep" a man's home. Biologically yes, but not all women marry or have homes with children. And it is not contrary to having a home or a family that you earn a living. Many happy mothers or happy motherless women define themselves by their work or career. Independence, in my idea of feminism, is equal work for equal pay, being seen as who you are first, instead of an object "worthy of a man's affection". Acting like objects instead of Mary, or Jane, or Sue is what keeps us dependent in the gender role that is traditional. Simply put, I am Helen, I am a graphic designer. I want to be paid the same as John Doe for the same job. I do not want to be seen as "pretty" and dismissed as a girl. I pay my own way and I deserve respect for being a whole person and not the "better half" of someone who sees me as "worthy" because of my looks to wait on him. We would do better to worry less about equal treatment for women and more about making men into human beings. Their mothers spoil and ruin them and they don't carry their weight in the home. Enough of that. It only perpetuates the idea that their work is more important and they should earn more.

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    Replies
    1. You have hit the nail on the head. The problem I have with the feminist movement is that we have broken barriers to enter on our own terms but we are now expected to carry an even heavier load. There are so many
      "how to" guides regarding balancing your career and family for women and yet none for men because it is not required for them to have to balance both. We broke into the industry but did not break the mind set of society or men as a whole. What we ended up with was helping to bring home the bacon and still being expected to cook the dang thing. I am sorry to say that men as a majority are not pulling their weight in this society and we are not holding them up to the same standards that we have women held. We are not making them accountable. Along the way feminism has created a gap and men are taking what feminists stood for and bastardizing it.

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    2. Thank you for your reply Actionmoviefreak!! I agree that I may havve used the term feminism loosely. But I think we do relate on the same sides of the coin, just from different perspectives. I agree..with you when you said .... "would do better to worry less about equal treatment for women and more about making men into human beings. Their mothers spoil and ruin them and they don't carry their weight in the home.Enough of that. It only perpetuates the idea that their work is more important and they should earn more." I am all for feminism in the sense that our daughters are made to know themselves and seek to be treated equally. At the same time, the fact that there is still this antiquated belief that we "belong" in the home peeking through and we are Expected to play the role without a healthy balance from our contributing partners. THANKS FOR READING!!!!!!!

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